Welcome Back & Book Review

Hi Parents!

     How are you all doing?  I pray that you all are well and that you are finding some sort of beauty in this season. If I'm being honest, the combination of more family time and slowing down has helped me pinpoint some gaps in my parenting.
     A few weeks ago, after a couple of challenging days with my little ones, I plopped into bed feeling that same old familiar feeling of tiredness mixed with unsettling. Did my children hold a secret meeting to plan ways to push my buttons? I pictured them in their super hero pjs writing their plan on a whiteboard while I thought they were sleeping. I laid in bed and started scrolling different articles, blogs and parenting websites for guidance.  I ended up ordering some books to help me with these cycles that I feel I get stuck in with my parenting.
     Over Spring break I dove into No-Drama Discipline: The Whole-Brain Way to Calm the Chaos and Nurture Your Child's Developing Mind By Daniel J. Seigel and Tina Payne Bryson (longest title ever!). I highly recommend this book to any parent. The book unpacks what's going on with your child's brain in a way that makes you go, "Ah, now it all makes sense."

Here are some of my favorite takeaways from the book: 

• The word used in the title as "discipline" is explained in the book as "teaching."
• When our children are upset, their downstairs brain is reacting. Our job is to teach them how to calmly integrate their upstairs brain too.
• Children need to be taught how to regulate their emotions. When your child is having a meltdown think of it as their way of saying, "I need help."
• Connection and empathy are the first priority in moments of difficulty. "Engage don't enrage." Have you ever had a hard time and then had someone tell you to calm down, or that you should have known better? It's a pretty surefire way to get someone more upset. Children are the same way. I'm challenged to lean on understanding first and then to wait for the teachable moment. Without connection, emotions can continue to spiral out of control.
• Consistency is important
• I learned to make eye contact, listen to their frustrations and to respect them.  It's important to show them that I'm on their side even in their most difficult moments.

     These takeaways only scratch the surface of this wonderful book. I really believe it's going to be one I come back to and flip through often.

Heres the link to buy No Drama- Discipline on Amazon

Hug your preschooler for me!

Miss Kat